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joel. (
subsistere
) wrote
2014
-
08
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29
10:23 pm
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joel@CDC.ORG
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<span style="font-family:courier;"> <b>SUBJECT:</B> TEXT <b>SENT:</B> DAY #, HOUR <b>FROM:</B> SURNAME.NAME@cdc.org <b>TO:</b> SURNAME.NAME@cdc.org [[200 max character message here]]</span>
<span style="font-family:courier;><b>SENT:</B> DAY#, HOUR <B>CALL ID:</B> CDC ID</span> [[3 minute max message here]]
<span style="font-family:courier;"><b>SENT:</B> DAY #, HOUR <B>( 1 ) VOICEMAIL</B> LAST NAME, FIRST NAME [[3 minute max message here]]</span>
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no subject
subsistere
2015-03-01 06:55 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
I ain't offering you food.
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Whiskey.
no subject
retry
2015-03-01 07:01 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
I'm not asking.
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Scotch? Irish? Or are you not picky.
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-01 07:10 am (UTC)
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link
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[ This is weird. ]
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
American. Are you trying to ask me on a date?
no subject
retry
2015-03-01 07:12 am (UTC)
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link
)
[ She's socially awkward, please be kind. ]
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
What?
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 05:23 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Forget it.
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
I'm not picky.
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 05:27 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Broody. One-word responses. Protective. You are my type.
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
But you have baggage.
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 05:37 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Okay.
[ We're not discussing that baggage thankyouverymuch. ]
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Is this cause you're the woman I have to report to now?
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 05:51 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
You won't try convincing me otherwise?
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Are you taken?
[ Conveniently evading his question for now, he may have to get used to it. ]
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 05:55 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
It ain't really any of your business.
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Are you serious?
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 05:56 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
I'm always serious.
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Are you taken or have you just given up?
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:03 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
You're gonna have to do a lot more than just offer me whiskey, sweetheart.
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:05 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Is that your way of saying I have to put out?
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:08 am (UTC)
(
link
)
[ How did this happen. ]
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
You're gonna have to get to second base before you ever reach home run.
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:12 am (UTC)
(
link
)
[ Oh my god, are they really talking about this? If he could only see Amber cackling. ]
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Is this the part where I ask my place or yours?
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:18 am (UTC)
(
link
)
[ Do you know how long it's been since he's been on a date. ]
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
It ain't gonna be mine.
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:20 am (UTC)
(
link
)
[ She's never been on a date that she remembers. Period. ]
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Alright. Mine. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
[ The hottest rover name... ever. ]
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:35 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
You've gotta be kidding.
[ NOT SURE IF... EUPHEMISM... OR ROVER NAME... ]
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:36 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
Don't be so hard on yourself.
[ IT'S A REAL... ROVER NAME... SADLY. ]
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:39 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Look, you get me a bottle of whiskey and we'll talk.
[ Not really but he'll get a bottle of whiskey out of it AYYYYY. ]
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:42 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
I can talk to you anytime I want.
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
A bottle of whiskey for five honest answers.
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:55 am (UTC)
(
link
)
[ There is a long ass pause before Joel ever comes back to answer this question. Talking sex was one thing. Talking honesty? That was something else entirely. ]
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Only if it's a good bottle of whiskey.
no subject
retry
2015-03-02 06:57 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
amber@cdc.org
I'm on it.
[ He should be very afraid . . . ]
no subject
subsistere
2015-03-02 06:58 am (UTC)
(
link
)
FROM:
joel@cdc.org
Okay.
433 comments
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no subject
I ain't offering you food.
FROM: joel@cdc.org
Whiskey.
no subject
I'm not asking.
FROM: amber@cdc.org
Scotch? Irish? Or are you not picky.
no subject
FROM: joel@cdc.org
American. Are you trying to ask me on a date?
no subject
FROM: amber@cdc.org
What?
no subject
Forget it.
FROM: joel@cdc.org
I'm not picky.
no subject
Broody. One-word responses. Protective. You are my type.
FROM: amber@cdc.org
But you have baggage.
no subject
Okay.
[ We're not discussing that baggage thankyouverymuch. ]
FROM: joel@cdc.org
Is this cause you're the woman I have to report to now?
no subject
You won't try convincing me otherwise?
FROM: amber@cdc.org
Are you taken?
[ Conveniently evading his question for now, he may have to get used to it. ]
no subject
It ain't really any of your business.
FROM: joel@cdc.org
Are you serious?
no subject
I'm always serious.
FROM: amber@cdc.org
Are you taken or have you just given up?
no subject
You're gonna have to do a lot more than just offer me whiskey, sweetheart.
no subject
Is that your way of saying I have to put out?
no subject
FROM: joel@cdc.org
You're gonna have to get to second base before you ever reach home run.
no subject
FROM: amber@cdc.org
Is this the part where I ask my place or yours?
no subject
FROM: joel@cdc.org
It ain't gonna be mine.
no subject
FROM: amber@cdc.org
Alright. Mine. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
[ The hottest rover name... ever. ]
no subject
You've gotta be kidding.
[ NOT SURE IF... EUPHEMISM... OR ROVER NAME... ]
no subject
Don't be so hard on yourself.
[ IT'S A REAL... ROVER NAME... SADLY. ]
no subject
Look, you get me a bottle of whiskey and we'll talk.
[ Not really but he'll get a bottle of whiskey out of it AYYYYY. ]
no subject
I can talk to you anytime I want.
FROM: amber@cdc.org
A bottle of whiskey for five honest answers.
no subject
FROM: joel@cdc.org
Only if it's a good bottle of whiskey.
no subject
I'm on it.
[ He should be very afraid . . . ]
no subject
Okay.